Do they really look like twins?

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004Everywhere we go, folks ask, “Are they twins?” or some derivation. I realize that, as their mother, I am beyond biased in this matter, but superficial similarities aside — e.g., short, dark hair; clear skin; and height — they do not seem to resemble each other enough to provoke a “Twins?” comment. I await your (gentle) correction in the comments.

Until then…
Over the past week, we’ve enjoyed a few adventures:

■ In the spring of 2003, my son and I attended our first Shakespeare Project of Chicago (SPC) production, The Merchant of Venice. That fall, we saw The Two Gentlemen of Verona, directed by Jeff Christian, who also played Valentine, if I remember correctly; and the following season, we caught The Winter’s Tale. After that, our relocation from Chicago to the tiny woods on the prairie coupled with the kids’ swim meet schedule and, later, their weekend gigs as lifeguards and swim instructors prevented us from attending.

Some white space remained on the family calendar this past weekend, though, and Mr. M-mv and the Misses joined me in seeing my fourth and their first SPC reading. In a neat “full circle” moment, it was The Two Gentlemen of Verona directed by Jeff Christian. For a few moments, it felt as if time were folding in on itself as I remembered encountering this play with Master M-mv more than a decade ago while Mr. watched the Misses play in a nearby park.

■ Speaking of the Misses, they are no longer quite so young: They took and passed their road test and are now licensed drivers.

■ The Misses were named to their team’s championship squad and will be competing at the Winter Regional Championship Meets and, the following weekend, at their team’s rec conference. Good stuff.

■ We enjoyed a lovely meander through the Lincoln Park Conservatory yesterday afternoon before heading to the Chicago Shakespeare Theater (CST) for another behind-the-scenes event — this time, a Stephen Sondheim-centric discussion with Gary Griffin, CST’s associate artistic director and the director of two CST productions this season (Gypsy and Road Show); Michael Mahler, musical director of Road Show; and Rick Boynton, CST’s creative producer.

18 responses

  1. No they do not look like identical twins. Strangers often confuse same gender siblings within 2 years as being twins. I think height and dress and hair style may also contribute. So many thought my best friend in high school and I were friends when we were similar, skin tone, hair color, eye color, height, clothing type, both in physical shape. I think maybe they think that more of people who are in synch and happy, that they are cut from the same cloth.

    Well the twin thing just brought back a memory. The weirdest ever homeschooler I met on a group museum trip. She was from NY and I’d never met her and she had two boys that looked like twins and I asked their ages (same as my son) and she said the age (the same age) and I said, “Are they twins?” She then blurts out that usually she says no to this but today she will say yes and asks why did I say it? I said bc you said they are the same age and they look the same as each other, same height and every single thing and so I wondered if their same age was because they were born close and at present not one year apart in age due to birthdays. She then went on a rant saying that yes they are identical but she had told everyone forever that they were not because she thinks it s bad thing to be a twin as they have no individual identity and it’s a terrible hindrance. So she said she never told her boys they were twins and she lies to everyone who asks, except me. I tried to say how do you know a twin will never have a fully developed self-concept as an individual and better yet maybe having a more unique perspective as something special, an identical twin, is something that’s even better.

    Anyway it was a day when I thought, “No wonder some say homeschoolers are so weird.”

  2. I had never thought of them as twins. But the last few pictures you’ve posted had me re-thinking! Have people always asked that about the Misses, or is it recent?

    • You’ve made me think, and I suppose it’s occurred most over the last three years. The youngest had her hair cut into an angled bob in 2010 and then just as short as her sister’s in early 2011. By then, they were about the same height, too. On first, second, even third and fourth glance, they *do* look alike.

  3. “it felt as if time were folding in on itself ” – I love that, as I love hearing about your adventures. You are layering their lives with good memories.

    Your girls have different eyes. Could it—the recurring twin question—be because people are not as attentive these days? At a glance, it would be easy to assume twinship. But if you really look, you really see, then no.

    I have a funny twin story. I taught piano lessons to four sisters, among them one set of identical twins. The first three months I couldn’t tell them apart until they started playing. I identified them by the pieces I had assigned. They didn’t dress identical; it shouldn’t have been that hard.

    • “Could it—the recurring twin question—be because people are not as attentive these days? At a glance, it would be easy to assume twinship. But if you really look, you really see, then no.”

      And I suppose that is the heart of the matter. If one *really* looks, they are not at all alike. But who, apart from a friend or relative needs to look closely? I should probably just get over myself, eh? Heh, heh, heh.

      Related to the piano lesson anecdote: Their first coach met them when they were quite young and had different hairstyles and heights. She has never had any trouble telling them apart. Their current coach, though, who has seen them through two years and four swim seasons, can only tell them apart in the water!
      He’s utterly flummoxed during dryland, but as soon as they begin swimming, he’s beyond certain.

  4. We have fraternal twins in the family and I had always thought they might get fewer “Are you a twin?” questions as they grow older and develop different interests, friends, styles of dress, etc.; that because they have similar coloring but very different faces, the twin question was based on the double stroller, similar clothes and so forth. It sounds like that may not be the case…I do think your non-twins look more alike than our actual girl twins!

  5. Jenny’s double stroller evokes another funny twin story: my friends have four adopted girls. Because the adoption process is a fragile thing, they pursued two adoptions at the same time. They became the proud parents of two girls, a month apart. One was a long, chunky black girl, the other a tiny Filipino.

    They said, you would never believe how many folks looked at the babies (who in no way resembled their adopted parents) in the double stroller and asked, “Are they twins?”

  6. I never thought they were twins, but I can definitely see where – like others have said – the similar hair styles and fashion sense would lead someone to believe that!

  7. I think, besides familial similarity, there is also some sort of “twin-ness” seen in a close relationship.

    My boys, almost two years apart (and never in a double stroller!), one blonde and one red-head, were often taken for twins until they were about 8 and 10–and yes, there was a significant size difference for all of that time! But then one day someone who had asked said, “Yes, I see it now…but they get along so well.”

    Your daughters, it seems to me, have a very close relationship, and so “they must be twins” because “normal” siblings just fight.

    Just a thought.

  8. I can see how your daughters’ features are different. I have two daughters and everyone always tells me that they look exactly like me. I think they only say that though, because they share my coloring. My oldest daughter, especially, looks MUCH more like my husband. I think people just don’t look that closely.

  9. If I didn’t know from reading your blog that they were not twins, then I would wonder if they were. Just as if I didn’t know from reading your blog that you are their mom, I might assume that you were their older sister. :)

  10. I can see how others think your lovely daughters are twins. And I must say that the three of you together make a lovely picture of sisters!

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